Here’s a sneak peek inside IVF and becoming a human labratory (I’ll give the in-depth, confidential, E! True Hollywood Story look at my thrilling experience in later posts):
Step 1: Lots more blood tests, semen analysis, and other tests.
Step 2: Get back on the pill (WTF?!- I’ll explain later)
Step 4: Many instruments are shoved up my lady bits to make sure there’s a safe womb for baby
Step 5: My belly becomes a pin cushion (up to three injections a day, which I give myself- where’s that jug of wine when I need it!)
Step 6: Go in for the egg retrieval procedure where they knock me out, take the eggs I’ve been making plump and juicy with the awesome injections (and hit on my anesthesiologist- it was the drugs!)
Step 7: Start shoving more things up my lady bits
Step 8: Doctor transfers one to two mini-me’s (embryos) back in my uterus.
Step 9: Pray… and wait. Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooots of waiting.
Here is the calendar my doctor gave me to keep track of everything (sorry, it's a bit blurry, but I can't be good at everything!):
|What an infertile woman's life becomes |
(all those words you don't recognize are injections, pills, and other medication). Yeehaw!